Isn't it funny how with some past loves, you can barely fathom the love you once had? With me, at least, the truly great loves I've had, number to all of three, including Nikki. Heaven forbid we ever part. I would never forget the love we had. I can honestly say that it would outweigh any former love, hands down.
I pluck hairs from my face and neck all the time now. Actually, Nikki plucks my hairs more often than I do. That doesn't hurt nearly as much as it used to. I'm not sure if this comes from repeated plucking, or if it's related to hormone replacement therapy in some way. Sadly, I haven't been to a single electrolysis session since I wrote this entry.
Friday, September 29, 2006
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Current mood: silly
I know, it's been a long, long time since I've written a real blog. Just to be safe, I'm typing this in Word ("Word, yo. Letters and shit."), because this wacky MySpace contraption keeps messing up in numerous ways. Tom from MySpace is one darned hooligan. Friggin whippersnapper.
Anyway, I've been through quite a lot over the past two months. I have a girlfriend now (Hi, Tee!), and we've had some ups and downs. It's been more up than down (much more), and I consider myself so fortunate to have met her and won her love. I've also had some ups and downs with Vanessa, my best friend and roommate. Thankfully, things look pretty good at the moment, hence the silly blog.
I have been hit with expenses left and right. While out in Queens last month, my car got booted. It was $125 + tax (which was about $9) to have the boot removed, and I didn't have that much, nor any credit to use. Oops! Tee and I had to walk to her apartment so that her mom could help us out with some cash. The whole thing was really bad. I would've been stuck in Queens otherwise, and I had work the next day!
Then my car decided to start giving me trouble in quite a few ways. The brakes were going, so I needed two new rotors and a brake pad. My fuel injector also misfired, causing damage to my distributor cap and the rotor in the engine. So I needed a new fuel injector as well as those two things. My battery was leaking, so that had to be replaced. Thanks to Tee for that help. My engine was also overheating, so the hose and/or the thermostat for the radiator have to be replaced. This still has to be done, but I did buy the thermostat. This all came to almost $700, but thankfully my father was able to help me out with that.
About a week ago, I see that my cellphone bill came to $176! It turns out that my free minutes were starting at 9 PM, when I really thought they began at 7 PM. Oops again! So I got charged for 1100-something minutes. I did quite a bit of talking between 7 and 9 PM. As Grandmaster Flash said, "Now I'm broke and it's no joke…" I had to put off seeing my daughter in September, due to all of this. I hope to go see her in two weeks though.
On the transsexual front, I have not started my real life test (aka RLT, aka "full-time"), as I previously planned. The last time I wrote about this, I was waiting for my ex's lawyer to get off his ass. Well, he did, but he messed something up. He wrote that my ex was to bring Brittany up every month, when we had agreed to alternate months (I go down one month, and she's brought up the next month). So this has to be rewritten. The lawyer needs this in written form from my ex. She hasn't done this yet. Until the divorce is final, I can't risk changing my name and other legal papers. It'll make things so much more complicated, and will bring about a higher chance of losing visitation with my daughter, than if we are already divorced and everything is finalized. I'm really upset that I can't start living my life the way I want to. This in-between crap is getting old fast.
Because of my money loss and falling behind on bills, I haven't gone to electrolysis in over a month. This has caused me a great deal of anxiety as I'm seeing more hairs grow back in. Eventually, they'll be gone forever in any case, but I haven't been able to keep up with it. The other day I was plucking hairs from my chin with a tweezer. It hurt, but it does look better to me now. I'm probably the only one who notices the hairs, at least to the extent that I do, but I hate those hairs so bad. I've had almost 60 hours of electrolysis and I still have so much more to go. Electrolysis is the most tedious part of transition for a male-to-female transsexual, hands down. And it hurts pretty bad too.
I think I've bombarded you all with enough information for awhile. As usual, I welcome all comments. I hope you are all doing well. And hey… keep in touch with a fellow psycho!
Currently reading:By Douglas Niles
Release date: August, 1991
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