Back on the Diet Train Again

Choo choo! Next stop... hunger pains!

Okay, it isn't that bad. I just started the Special K Diet on Monday (Feb. 28th). Last time I did this, I lost 13 pounds! The Provera (progesterone supplement) that I was on helped put a lot of that back on (about six pounds). That and nachos. Darn those yummy things. So now I'm starting this diet again. I was 165 pounds the first time, and I went down to 152. Now I'm 158, so we'll see how I do this time. Just for reference on why I'm bitching about being in the 150's, I am 5'5" and I have a slim build. When I met Nikki, I was 140 pounds. I'd love to get back to that! I have a lot of cute clothes that just don't fit me anymore.

I have two bars a day (one for breakfast and one for lunch), and then whatever I want for dinner. Drinks are as usual (though I usually just drink water anyway), and I can snack on raw vege's and fruit if I get hungry. As a matter of fact. I'm eating a bunch of baby carrots right now. We have a lot of bags stored up, so it's about time I got munchin'! I'm also pulling the wagon with the kids every day (to bring Savannah home from school), and since it's getting a bit warmer in the morning, I've been pulling it to bring Savannah to school as well. All together, that's about five miles a day, while pulling 50-something pounds behind me. I wasn't doing that kind of exercise last time I went on this diet.

Enough about that. I called about my therapist yesterday (I mentioned him here). They still haven't set me up, or called me, or anything. I don't know how long this is supposed to take, but I would like to get back in therapy sometime in the next decade. Heh!

Comments. What's up, people? No comments at all lately. Look at my last two posts. Zero, zilch, zip. And here I thought the "Dear Amy" post would generate a lot of comments. I'm still getting as many hits on my posts as always, just no comments. Was it something I said? To paraphrase Christopher Walken, "I got a fever... and the only prescription... is more comments!" So keep `em coming in if you can, even if it's just a simple, "Hey, nice post."   :)


On the Nikki front, things have been going much better for her at work lately (for those not aware, read the "Classroom Homophobia" post). She did a prayer in church a few weeks ago, and had a meeting with the principal and the homophobic jerk teacher she works with. First, the teacher lied and said that everything Nikki was saying is not true, and she has no problem with her. But then she really seemed to have no problem with her! She was civil all day, and continued doing so for the next three weeks. Wow. So chalk it up to the power of prayer if you will. Maybe there's another explanation, but for whatever reason, she decided to stop making my sweetie's life a living hell. That sure works for Nikki.

Until next time...

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Classroom Homophobia

I believe that Nikki is working with a homophobic teacher. She works as a teacher aide in a classroom for children with special needs. The school had some trouble with the teacher she used to work with. That teacher was totally incompetent. She was replaced, but Nikki was sent to a different classroom, and a different teacher. She was glad that the idiot teacher was gone, but sad to be moved away from two other aides who she had become friends with. She is completely "out" at that school, and her friends had no problem with her orientation at all, nor does the principal.

This new teacher seemed much easier to work with at first. However, if Nikki would mention me (usually in passing), she or the aide would give her a funny look. Like a rolling-eyes kind of look. Nikki really didn't feel all that comfortable in this new room, but she had to make the best of it.

A few weeks before Christmas, I arrived at the school to pick up Nikki. (We only have one car, and I had an appointment that day, so I took the car.) She wanted the kids to come in and see the classroom and meet the teacher and the aide. I came with them. Everything seemed fine, and we only stayed for a fer minutes. (The teacher is real cutie, hehe!)  But... immediately following that, Nikki started having trouble with the teacher.

The teacher would tell her to do something, then tell her not to do it the next day. She would want things done a specific way, but when Nikki would try to anticipate for this and ask questions, she would get, "I can't tell you exactly what to do every minute of the day!" She would complain to Nikki that Nikki has no rapport and is not close with the kids. The children in that class don't trust anyone new.

Some of these kids go to different classes for certain activities. Nikki was told to go with the kids and help the teachers in those classrooms out, like if they needed help with a badly behaved student. The teacher soon told her that the teachers were complaining about her. She claimed they told her that Nikki was "interrupting the class" and so forth. Nikki would merely be standing by a wall, not saying a word. My sweetie is not the interrupting type. She's really quiet and unassuming, except around those she knows and is comfortable with.

Nikki asked all the teachers if they had any problem with her, and if she was interrupting in any way when she would bring a student into their classroom. They said that no, she wasn't... and had only nice things to say to her. Either they're not being honest, or the teacher that Nikki works with is lying.

There have been other scenarios, but I won't go into them all. Suffice to say, they are all BS. Because of this teacher's reactions from before she met me, and then the way everything started hitting the fan right after she met me... I'm claiming shenanigans. This is homophobia, pure and simple. (Possibly transphobia, if she somehow clocked me as being born male.) She's trying to get Nikki out of her classroom. She even went so far as to suggest to Nikki that she might want to find employment in another school, namely elementary. True, Nikki would rather work in elementary than in a middle school, since that's where her education is, but it's not hard to see where this teacher's true motivations are.

Nikki is really worried about having her reputation tarnished. If she's wrongly accused of not being able to follow instructions, or interfering with other classrooms, that might go on her employment record, and endanger the possibility of her finally having her own special ed class. This has been Nikki's goal for as long as she can remember, and to have it ruined by one homophobic ass would be beyond heartbreaking.

Nikki had an appointment with the principal just this past Monday. She said that Nikki stomps around grumpily, and doesn't interact with the students or faculty. Huh? She says "good morning" to any staff member she sees, and the teacher won't even answer her most of the time. She's also always helping the other students with their work or whatever else they need help with. Nikki is not the most outgoing person out there (and neither am I), but doesn't act grumpy at work.

I'm just hoping and praying that she gets through the next four months okay. Then she can go on to do her internship at another school, and possibly have her own classroom. My baby deserves better than this.

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Exploring Sexuality

My daughter, Sarah... has a girlfriend. Yes, a girlfriend girlfriend.

Well, as much as someone can have a significant other when they're almost 12 years old (her birthday is in two weeks!). Her girlfriend's name is Tyne (I think I spelled it right), and she lives in our apartment complex. She's been friends to both our daughters (Sarah and Savannah) for the past few months. She's nine years old, and has been very forthcoming, so to speak, of letting people know that she's bisexual. Now, believe me, I'm all for letting people be whoever the heck the are... but something about this girl doesn't sit right with me.

Two weeks ago, Amy and her two kids, Rachel and Zoey came over. Lori and her family came by an hour or so later. At the playground, Tyne was reportedly talking about sex toys and such. Lori's son came back and told us. Sarah and Rachel both had a talking to. It was this big thing, he said/she said/she said. I later found out that Tyne has a crush on Rachel. (Amy, if you are reading this, shhhh!)

Last night, Sarah came in late. Our rule is that once the lights come on in the complex, the kids come home. Sarah came inside after the lights came on, and asked if Tyne could come in. I didn't see any reason why, and I was going to start cooking dinner soon, so I told her no. She went back outside. I got up after a minute and looked out the door. She was gone. I told Nikki, and I agreed that she should be grounded, and we'd go look and/or yell for her if she wasn't home for dinner.

Sarah came back a half an hour later. I dutifully informed her that she was grounded the next day for coming in late. "Okay." She asked if Nikki was up, to which I told her I didn't know. After she knocked on our bedroom door a few times, I told her that if she wasn't answering, she may indeed be taking a nap. She told me, "Okay." She sat down to watch TV and she didn't say another word.

Nikki got up to have some dinner with us, and Sarah immediately started writing something on a piece of paper. She handed it to Nikki, who then told Sarah that she was the one who said she would be grounded. I immediately took offense, as Sarah has a history of trying to pit one parent against the other, or go around one parent and going to another. Nikki told me that wasn't the case, and she would relay what was written... after dinner. Sarah didn't want her sisters to know, and she was rather embarrassed.

Sarah asked Tyne out (like they could actually go anywhere), and Tyne said yes. Tyne said she loves Sarah.

I think Tyne is a player. Probably a more innocent nine-year-old version of a player, but a player nonetheless. I don't trust her. Tyne wants Sarah to sleep over. Nikki and I are like, nooooo wayyy! Who knows what kind of sex toys she'll pull out of the closet. Ha! It's funny, but at the same time... ummm, not funny. This is my daughter here.

Anyway, after being debriefed by Nikki, I came back out to the living room, hugged Sarah, gave her a kiss on the forehead, and told her I loved her.

Sarah later asked Nikki if I only did that because she likes a girl. Hello??? I always tell her I love her. And what's with this not talking to me? Everything has to be relayed lately.

For the record, no... I do not love my daughter more because she likes a girl, or is dating a girl, sort of. I think that maybe Sarah feels a bit more free to be herself, and to explore her sexuality, ahem... on a VERY limited basis, mind you. She has two lesbian moms, two transgender friends, and their moms, who are transgender, bisexual, and a few straight people thrown in there (ha ha!). Does she feel that she should be a lesbian as well? I sincerely doubt that. There are so many people out there who think that a child being raised by gay parents will also be gay. Pure hogwash and cow manure. But yes, I do feel that she feels more safe in telling us she likes a girl, and it's probably easier for her to admit it to herself as well. She knows that nothing is wrong with being gay.

That said, danger lies on both sides of the fence. Sarah is so sensitive. I hope this girl doesn't try to break her heart. I know where she lives, after all.  ;)

transsexual transexual transwoman transgender transgendered trans crossdresser transvestite travestie breasts boobs sex girl lesbian hot beautiful gorgeous pretty sexy mtf male-to-female m2f male to female tranny grs srs gender reassigment surgery change transition ladyboy sleepover sleep over redhead red head legs thighs chest shemale sexuality hormone hormones hrt replacement therapy makeover teen coming out orgasm climax allure alluring attractive desirable desireable hair eyes lips mouth tongue nipples feet toes hands caress fondle love making

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Diarrhea of the Mouth

I don't know what's up, but Nikki has been going crazy lately, saying very non sequitur type of things to people. People we don't even know. And since she's seen me getting rather embarrassed by such things, she's doing it even more.

It started in Wal-Mart. I suppose she was bored and tired. She congratulated a man on his way out, for his selection of Tide detergent. He said, "What?" She repeated it, and he looked exasperated. He said, "Whatever," and walked out. I was trying to get away at that point, but Nikki had my arm and wouldn't let go.

The other day, she made two ladies laugh at her. We were in the car at a stop light. I was caressing Nikki's cheek. I'm often affectionate like this with my sweetie. But there was a woman in the lane next to us, just dead-on staring. As comfortable as we are with each other, we forget that others may be set aback by seeing two women in love. I told her that a woman over there was looking at us. Nikki thought the window was closed. (That's her story anyway.) She looked at the woman and said, plain as day, "I'm her baby."

The woman laughed. It was a twittering kind of laugh. Naturally, we both just started laughing also. But we were stuck at the light, and the lady was still next to us. Nikki took a nearby sweatshirt and covered her head with it. Unfortunately for me, I was driving, so I couldn't do this. I just looked away and continued to laugh. Finally the light turned green and I could get out of there!

Later on, we were in a grocery store, and Nikki randomly blurted out, "People. I eat them." This older lady who was passing by started laughing her ass off. I ducked down a nearby aisle. I mean, really now. Nikki says she eats people.

Short of knocking her unconscious, what can I do about this? She's driving me nuts, ha ha!

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Oops Again! (7 Days to Go!)

I missed a day again. One week `til we leave for Arizona. Wow, just a week!

Nikki and I watched "But I'm a Cheerleader," and then went to bed since it was so late and all. I've seen the movie once, but it was Nikki's first time watching it. If you've never seen it, I would highly recommend it. It carries a powerful message, that one should be who they are and not try to be someone they're not, just to please others. That, and the whole "Ex-Gay" thing is a farce!

Gotta go! I'm off to get some finishing touches on my tattoo. The appointment is in less than two hours. Blog with pics to come tonight. Film at 11. Wish me luck!

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Adventures in Wal-Mart (Starring Amy and Nikki)!

Right after I wrote my last blog entry, like less than an hour later (seriously), we lost our internet. That bill caught up with us again. So I'm writing this in Notepad, waiting to copy/paste it into my blog.

Well, I brought you up to date on my life so far, in the last entry. I did leave out something for another entry. Despite all the stress, arguments, etc., Nikki and I can still have a lot of fun. And Nikki is extra-fun when she gets tired! If we go out in public somewhere (like Wal-Mart in this instance), then hilarity often ensues.Read on...

Some female in another aisle yelled to someone else (rather loudly), "I love you!" Nikki yelled back, "I love you too!" This is when I usually try to hide. I said, "Oh my God, hun!" Nikki copied what I said, word for word. A man was in the aisle with us, and then he said, in a voice that couldn't have been his real voice... maybe a cross between Yoda and Arnold Shwartzenegger, "Oh my God." We laughed and skedaddled out of there.

Then Nikki was trying to decide between buying canned white corn, or yellow corn. With her head cocked to one side, she said to a woman passing by (and this was not said seriously), "What about you, do you like white corn or yellow corn?" The lady responded most earnestly, "Oh, yellow corn. Most definitely, I love yellow corn." So I'm pretending to clear my throat to cover the laughter now. Nikki had to switch gears and talk seriously, and tell the lady thank you. It's not that she likes to start trouble with people, it's just that when she's really tired, words come out of her without her brain having any say-so.

Okay, I have another. I was determined to get Canada Dry ginger ale. I've been craving the stuff lately (that and the 7-11 chips with chili and cheese... I know, bad Amy). They didn't have Shweppes, and Vernor's is nasty, I don't care what anyone says. I see two bottles on the very top shelf, all the way in the back. Even if I could climb that, I couldn't reach into those little ramps. There was one bottle in two different ramps, and that was all Diet Canada Dry. Yechhh! These ramps are tilted so that when you take the bottle in front, the rest are supposed to slide down. Well, these two rebel bottles didn't slide. I tried to see if I could push them forward from the next aisle, but then I couldn't tell which bottle was which. I could only see the caps, and I couldn't reach them anyway. So I decided to go back to the bottles and try to scale the shelf. I wanted my Canada Dry! Nikki tried to hoist me up, and well, she succeeded, but she goosed me as well! One hand was almost in my crack (imagine if I was wearing a skirt or something?), and the rest unintentionally groped my ummm... goods. So we proceeded to broadcast all this to the entire aisle, which was quite packed. She gave me a broom to wack the bottles into falling forward, while holding onto the shelf (Nikki's hand now removed from the between-the-legs areas), and I was able to grab them. Time to hightail it out of there again.

In general, people stare us down if we walk around holding hands or with my arm over Nikki's shoulders, etc. This is to a much greater degree than in New York. People are so rude here. The men just gawk like some monkey, and the women try to look without actually looking. It's actually quite funny, when it's not downright annoying. Nikki has a habit of saying hello to these people when this happens. On this particular visit, she said to this one bald dude, "Hey, how are ya doing?" He looked quite alarmed, then looked away and started walking away from us faster than he had been. It was hilarious!

So I hope some of this amused some of you. It may be a "you had to be there" kind of funny, but hopefully I gave someone a chuckle. Thanks for reading!

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Stress... and a Way Out?

Nikki and I have been under so much stress lately. Yes, this isn't exactly a "happy blog," but neither will I do the "Oh woe is me routine."

I'm not working, and Nikki has been unable to work, due to the broken rib incident. It's now been four weeks, and she still can't pick up Skylar without enduring intense pain. Her job as a substitute teacher for emotionally and/or physically handicapped children requires quite a bit of lifting of said children. She should be able to go back to work in two weeks or so (I hope), but in the meantime, bills have fallen by the wayside. We've had our cellphone service cancelled, our cable/internet service cancelled, and now we have eight days to pay our overdue rent (over $1000) or be evicted.

I thought we had to be served an eviction notice at that point, and then we had thirty days to move out. Well, not here. We have 24 hours after March 5th, maybe more if the court is busy and doesn't get around to it for a day or two.

This is a bit less dire than what I've written so far. The manager of the complex is willing to work with us to set up a payment program, within limits. So we won't necessarily have to pay the full amount, but rather some as-yet-undetermined partial amount. Also, we filed for state emergency relief (SER) today. They should be able to pay at least some of the amount due, but will they be able to do so within eight days? Two of those days are non-business days as well. We originally had ten days, but we found that we had to give them copies of all our utility bills for six months (heat, electric, phone, internet (if that counts), car payments (ditto)), and copies of Nikki's paychecks and such. That took another day to locate the bills we still had, and print out the rest from the various companies' websites.

As I mentioned in my previous post, I've been on a really short fuse lately. Everything is usually fine with me, but I can't handle any added stress. I just crash and burn. Mostly I feel intense anger first, then sadness second. That's really not like me. I also have a history of seasonal depression. I despise the cold. I'm not too fond of wearing heavy clothes, dry skin, staticky hair, etc. Okay, very "not fond" there! I had my winter depression a lot worse last year, but it's still affecting me to a certain point. I try to do things I like to feel better, like reading, playing Facebook apps and other games, dressing pretty when I go out, and other such things. I can't wait for the temperature to start rising again. We're getting there!

Speaking of hating the cold, we're looking to get out of Michigan. It's not any colder here than New York (born and raised), but hey, I still hate the cold! Nikki has sent resumes out to 14 school districts in Arizona. Yes, Arizona! Where we know nobody (except for Lori... hi Lori!), and is over 2000 miles away from us. Nikki has also sent a few resumes to Atlanta, Georgia. From what we've heard, it's the most gay friendly southern state. Gay marriage isn't legal there, but I can "second-parent-adopt" our kids if something happened to their father. Little things like that are always nice (and I mean both the adoption thing, and something happening to their father. LOL!).

So we'll see. Just getting out there, and moving our stuff, and doing it all over with getting the kids doctors and therapists, getting them in school and the various special programs they need (if they have them down there), well it's daunting to say the least. I know it won't be easy, but nothing worth fighting for ever is.

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Depressed and Anxious (Blast From the Past Entry)

I don't receive many comments on these old "reprint" blogs, but oh well... I just don't have the compunction to write anything else. Maybe I'll have more enthusiasm tomorrow night. I'm allright. Just feeling blah. I just want to sit here and have some salsa and chips (best snack ever!) and play some Parasite Eve. Then cuddle with Nikki and fall asleep. That's just what makes me happy right now.

What a coincidence. I was rather down in this old blog post as well. Much more so than I am now. So hey, that's a good thing.  :)  Oh yeah, I left out a detail below: I was single-handledly holding all five us up in a double-bed hotel room for a month and a half, at eighty dollars a night. Owie.



Monday, April 30, 2007
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Current mood: depressed

I'm feeling rather depressed right now. I think I'm randomly getting small anxiety attacks too. It feels like sudden bursts of adrenaline accompanied to a panicky, sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. Our hardships just never seem to stop. I'm back at my parents' house, which is almost a prison for me. They don't approve of my lifestyle, the way I dress, my friends, etc. My mother is so critical and negative. She just can't seem to be able to look past her own little world. I hate being there, and I usually hide in the tiny room that I'm staying in.

I'm worse than broke. My account is in the negative by so much, it'll take three to four weeks just to get it out of the red. I'll be working seven days a week for awhile. I have to keep asking my parents for gas money, which I hate doing. At least I'm staying there rent-free. If I was paying rent, it would take me months to get out of this hole.

DSS (Department of Social Services) dropped Nikki's case. I won't go into the details on why, but it really wasn't warranted. They make things next to impossible if you want help getting on your feet. She would have fought it with legal aid, but there's nowhere for her to stay while they go through the process. I couldn't afford the motel anymore.

So Nikki and the kids went to Michigan. I had to rent a car for her to get over there, since the engine blew on her truck during all of this (what luck!). She was told by her lawyer that it would be okay for her to move there, since she has nowhere for her and the kids to stay. Her lawyer also said that if she didn't make the court date on May 3rd, the case would just be dropped. Nikki left a week ago. It was so hard to see her pull away. She's over 600 miles away from me. I'm so lonely and I miss her so much.

It looked like everything would be okay for her. She was staying with her sister. She got herself on FIA (Family Income Assistance), which is the equivalent of DSS in NY. They're much nicer up there. She enrolled the kids in school and she started looking for jobs. She found a two-bedroom apartment for $400, and all that you need to get in is that $400! But then her bastard ex called her sister, threatening to throw Nikki, her sister, and her sister's husband in jail, and have their kids taken away. He said that Nikki kidnapped her kids, and they were accomplices for taking them in. She has custody of them! So of course, he was talking out his asshole (when does he not?), but Nikki's sister bought it hook, line and sinker. She threw Nikki out, and now Nikki is with her father. The next day, she gets a call. She's been hired for a job! But the job is by her sister's house, and now she's living an hour away. Also, the law guardian (the kids' lawyer) said she would issue a warrant for her arrest and revoke her teaching certification if she doesn't show up on the court date.

What's worse, is that her father is broke and is unable to help her with much more than food (he doesn't have much of that either) and a roof over her head. She doesn't have a car and he can't take her anywhere. His long distance service was suspended because of his money problems, so she can't call FIA (in another county, by her sister), or her lawyer back here in NY... or me. I don't get to talk her very much, because her father doesn't approve of our relationship. After about 15 minutes, you can hear him saying, "Get off the damn phone!" Even though he knows I'm the one that called. I'm worried that he'll get more aggravated as time goes by, and I won't be able to talk to her at all.

And it gets worse. Nikki's sister has her medication at her house. It was forgotten in all the rush to get her out of there. Her husband was supposed to meet her father to drop off the meds and some other things, but for some reason they got into a heated argument. She never got her meds. At least one of those meds is very important. It's called synthroid, and it helps her body perform simple things that her thryroid is unable to do. The last time she was unable to take it (when she was in the safe house), she ended up with nerve damage and possibly carpal tunnel in both wrists. She'll probably have to have surgery for that. I'm very worried about what's going to happen to her now.

The court date is coming up. Nikki will be trying to prove to the court that she's getting on her feet in Michigan. It's cheaper to get an apartment there, and she and the kids can stay with her dad until she gets one. She'll soon be getting cash assistance and food stamps. Plus, she technically has a job lined up.

However, there's no telling what they'll decide. It's likely that they won't allow the kids to be in a separate state from their father. The law guardian was threatening to throw the kids into foster care. I'm so nervous about this. I have no idea how to help my sweetheart. I wouldn't know what to say if she got her children taken away. There could be nothing I could possibly say or do to make it better.

I just to want to be with Nikki and the kids, and for us to be okay. That has seemed next to impossible for months now. I'm just waiting for things to start looking up. All I can do now is wait.

Currently listening:

Blue Planet

By Donna Lewis
Release date: 18 August, 1998

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"Excuse Me, But..."

Since coloring my hair, I've had no bad experiences in public. Well, okay, almost none. You can see it coming, can't you? Damn, I'm so predictable.

This will be nothing new to those on my Facebook friends list, but earlier this week, a twenty-something black girl came up to me as I was on the way to the mailbox. She had been walking the opposite way, on the opposite side of the street, with three of her friends. They were looking at me quite a bit, but I'm used to that, and my new hair is giving me loads of confidence (I hope it lasts!), so it bothered me not a bit.

I passed them, and she turned and came walking up behind me. She said, "Excuse me?" I turned to face her, already having a good idea of what she was about to say. She asked me, "I don't mean to be rude or anything... but you're a woman, right?" I told her, "Of course I am, why?" She said, "I was just asking, sorry." Then she walked back to her friends and she went, "Wooooh!"

My guess is that someone in the group thought I was a man... and it wasn't her. She won the bet, or the argument, or whatever. My question is, what made this person (or persons) see me as belonging to the male gender?

The word could've been spread by Nikki's sister or her sister's husband, or one of her kids. They moved out of our apartment complex a year ago, but I'm sure they talked to some people, and Nikki's brother-in-law had ranted and raved out his front door twice (as we hastily departed... he was scary), spouting out such epithets as "she-male" and "he-she." Yeah. So they hated me and weren't afraid to let the neighbors know about it. Or... sometimes I wonder if it's me. My walk, my voice... maybe my jaw-line is more pronounced than I think it is... maybe the wind had blown my hair and you can see that my hairline has receded just a bit. Who knows? I drive myself crazy with these kind of questions, way too often. If I knew what to fix, I would fix it if I could.

The good news is, the episode bothered me for an hour or two, and then I was fine. The kids had been playing out front, and I asked them if those people had talked to them at all. Sarah told me that she knew they were talking about us, but she couldn't hear what they were saying. `Kay. The kids were fine, so I was fine. My newly found confidence had not waned a bit. Oddly enough, life as a redhead has been a pretty positive experience so far. I thought I would just stand out and get noticed even more than before. Well... I haven't gotten any weird looks like I used to, but men just stare at me a lot more now.

In fact... ugh, I did not know what to do last night. Nikki, the kids and I were eating at a diner, and I noticed that an older man was staring at me from a few tables down. Every once in awhile, I would look his way to see if he was looking, and he always was. Then he put his elbow on the table, and his head on his hand, and just stared at me like that, smiling. It's been awhile since a guy would just blatantly stare like that, so I was at a loss at what to do. I tried not to look at him, but I kept looking anyway, wondering if he was still staring or not. I was totally flustered. No, I don't like men... but to have someone unexpectedly gaze at me with such apparent adoration... well, it was a bit much to handle right then.

Nikki and I celebrated our anniversary last night. We dropped the kids off at their grandfather's house, and we went off to Applebee's. We were both wearing pretty dresses, yay! The one I had on is one that Nikki bought for me a couple days ago. That and a pair of violet cubic zirconian stud earrings. She spoils me. I feel like a total shit because I have no money and no job right now, so I couldn't get her anything. I did make her a sweet card with the computer, using a website that I found. I did work hard on it, so it's the thought that counts. At least that's what I keep telling myself. Oh yes, we also got a new Canon printer/scanner combo at Best Buy a few days ago. I usually frown on combos of any kind, because if any component craps out, the whole unit is toast. We got a two-year warranty though, and it was pretty cheap to begin with. The pictures on my previous blog (about how Nikki and I met), were all scanned by yours truly. So the timing was right to get a scanner.

Nikki really hasn't been feeling well for the last couple of weeks. She was diagnosed with an iron deficiency, which has been causing fatigue, dizzy spells, nausea, plus her hair has been falling out! Her doctor put her on 650 mg of iron a day. (Just for reference, the average daily multivitamin contains 18 mgs.) She says she's feeling slightly better, and I wonder how long it will take before she has complete recovery. I had no idea that having low iron can cause such a drastic and swift decline in one's overall health. I'm really worried about my baby! She's thinking of going to another doctor to get a second opinion.

Nikki seemed tired, but okay last night, and we had a great time at Applebee's. Within the last couple years, they've added some menu items that really appeal to me. I got a reuben with a side of chili/cheese fries. Nikki got a steak with some vege's and the like. While waiting for our order, I saw a pair of long-ass legs go by me. There's an oriental woman wearing a very short turtleneck dress. Dangerously short. Well, I didn't stare... and I think Nikki didn't either. Not sure about that though.  :P  She kept staring at us, though. Nikki and I had kissed once, and we were sitting close together (leaving an empty chair on the opposite side of the table), and I was rubbing her arm. Right after Nikki kissed me on the shoulder... the asian woman got up and sat next to the man she was with, so that she wouldn't be facing us. But then she kept looking back at us anyway. At one point, Nikki responded to her longish glance with a wave and a "Hi!" She didn't look at us at all after that! That was so damn funny. We're so used to having our kids around, that it's nice to just go out as a couple and see how people react to us. We don't try to cause these reactions, they just happen. After three years, we're still just as loving and affectionate to each other as ever. We usually don't make out in public, but we're always touching, holding hands, or giving each other little kisses. As long as nobody approaches us wielding a weapon, I could care less how they react. Actually, I find it to be quite entertaining.

We asked the waitress if she could take a picture of us for our anniversary, and here's how it came out:

We followed up dinner with a movie. We saw Zombieland. We both love horror movies, and I love zombies and apocalyptic tales. This wasn't really a horror movie, though. It was more of a black, twisted comedy. We loved it! I would highly recommend it if you like zombies and have a sense of humor. Woody Harrellson played the lead role, as a man looking for his last Twinkie fix, and he had a neurotic young man as a sidekick -- the kind of guy you roll your eyes at, but end up rooting for in the end. Bill Murray even shows up as a zombie... sort of.

We had a fantastic time. I hate that it's over though. We hope to get out again before next Summer!

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Halloween SugarFest!

Nikki and I hosted a Halloween party for our kids and two guests yesterday afternoon. Well, ten were invited, but only two showed up. Nikki and I are very out as far as being lesbians, so maybe that was it. We've had a few kids say that their parents don't want them over because they have two moms. Last summer, one of the no-show boys was telling his friends that I'm a man. So maybe it was due to homophobia and transphobia, or maybe not. I really don't care, personally... I just don't want our children to be ostracized because of who their parents are. They deserve better than that. But what can I do about that, actually? Nada.

They all had fun anyway, despite the limited attendance, and despite the fact that Sarah got a bad skin reaction from the glue we used to attach the devil horns to her head. That crap just wouldn't come off for anything. Poor kid. Live and learn, though... never again! In the photos, you see she has a horned headband on instead.

The rest of the story is better told via photos and captions. So without any further ado...

All the kids! Savannah is looking at the camera, and Sarah is giving something to Skylar, who didn't want her shirt on for some reason.

Our two girls engaged in a mummy-wrapping contest. Sarah won.

Sarah, resident devil child.

Sarah trying to make Savannah laugh. You laugh, you lose the game.

Vannah pinning the head on the monster while Nikki and Sarah watch.

Sarah's turn to pin on the head.

Skylar pinning the head on the monster, with a height boost from Nikki.

Now Nikki is the one getting pinned!

Beautiful lil' devil.

Savannah got an apple!

 

Skylar's turn, with encouragement from her older sisters.

Nikki will kill me for posting this one, though you can only see a hint of the accidental cleavage that I cropped out. Yum!  ;)

I love my family.  :)

I hope everyone is having a nice time this Halloween, and for those in other parts of the world, a nice autumn or whatever time of the year it is for you!

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